Ways to get Your Ex Back
If you have just broken off with your ex and you want him or her back, I’ve got good news and bad news. The bad news is there is just no fixed formula for how to do it. But the good news is there are certain fixed principles that when applied work like a charm every time. So what are these principles and how do you apply them?
Firstly, there is the principle of wanting what you cannot have. It is human nature to desire what someone else has that you don’t. For this very reason, you should distance yourself from your ex. This will let him or her to take a good look at you from a distance and with a clear perspective. But what you must do is to change. You should look to improve yourself in the areas where you perceive yourself to be week, paying close attention to those areas that you think were responsible for your break up. Concentrate on trying to be the very best person that you can be. Also take the opportunity to make some new friends and catch up with friends you have not been in touch with for some time. The purpose is to enable your ex to see the improved version of you having many friends who find you friendly, fun to be with and attractive. This is not about making your ex jealous but more about looking to improve yourself soyou feel a great deal better about yourself.
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Secondly comes the principle of meeting emotional needs. One of the strongest glues that make a couple stick together is being able to meet each other’s emotional needs. Obviously, the emotional needs of men are different from that of women and each person’s emotional needs is unique but let me share with you the primary emotional need of every man and woman. This is a fact, no matter what kind of man or woman your ex is.
The primary emotional need of a man is respect. Respect entails honor, admiration, esteem, being looked up to etc. So if you want to get your ex back, you must show that you are the woman who can meet his emotional needs especially for respect the way that no other woman can. You must never shame him or even deride him in public. You should the occasion was to complement him, congratulate him, encourage him and sing his praises especially in public. This will endear him back to you. It works like gangbusters, believe me.
As a man you should know that, the most important emotional requirement for a woman is security. Security involves love, protection, relationship, companionship, being there for her etc. To win your ex back, you need to find ways to make her secure. You should always reassure her of your love (after you win her back, that is), show her that you are strong especially when under pressure, honor your commitments to her, do things for her (especially those she finds difficult or inconvenient to do) and spend quality time with her. This is what will bring your ex-girlfriend back to you.
So after you have made some changes to yourself, you can plan how to meet up with your ex. Find an opportune time when you know he or she would be most receptive. Just ask your ex for a no presure meeting, maybe for a coffee, a snack or maybe even a drink after work. If there is a special event going on, you can invite your ex to join you. It will probably be better to try and go out as a group. The purpose is for your ex to see the ‘new’ you and to have a good time with you. Do this a couple of times, but do try to ensure that it comes off as being natural. Do not pressure your ex into anything. Whenever you are together, intentionally find ways to meet your ex’s primary emotional need. Do so as often as possible. Soon your ex will notice the changes in you and will be touched by your actions to meet his or her emotional needs. This will put your relationship on track to be restored. If you play your cards right, your ex will be back with you sooner than you think.
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